Dear Lee,

NOTE - To understand who I'm referring to please see the KEY which is pasted on the bottom of the post. The words written in ORANGE color and are CAPITALIZED are the names of people in my life. To protect their identity I have used code names. Please refer to the Key to understand more about them. Thank you.

Dear Lee,

I am really tensed about my result for tomorrow. Our Pol science teacher said that 81 and a half is the highest and I will be crushed if I don't get the marks. This isn't like me. Worrying about marks, cribbing over how bad my paper was, yada yada yada. I was always the care free girl. But now I've become a worrier. I constantly worry all the time.


Gosh, I am so tensed. I read my horoscope and it something which meant that I wasn't using my abilities properly because I am worrying so much. SO TRUE! But what can I do? I believe that if you want something badly you get it. It doesn't matter if you deserve it or not. Though, I know I deserve the marks because I worked really hard. My worst fear is that the WHITE COAT will get what I want.

I know I should stop comparing myself to her and blah blah blah but no one has really told me HOW. Everyone tells me WHAT to do but they skip out on the most important thing. That is, telling me HOW to do what they want me to do. *SIGH*


Oh. God, I have stopped eating non-veg because I want my wish to be fulfilled. Though, I can't tell you what my wish is or It won't come true. If or WHEN it comes true, I'll reveal my wish.


But if it doesn't... I AM BECOMING AN ATHEIST. I hope the Gods are reading this and fretting over me becoming an atheist. Or maybe they see these as empty threats.ARGH.

I pray with all my heart that my wish comes true. :X I am so scared. I have become such a dork! Gosh.

More of a worrier actually. I'm looking up sites to solve my anxiety problem. Gosh. "http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/anxiety-files/201005/the-worst-advice-worrier" This is good. Better than the help I get from people around me.
 UFF, anyway,


I was really worried and depressed so I wanted to pour my feelings out on this blog.


XOXO

Love,

Anna